I am I Again

The agitation? The nerve of me? Do you believe in me still, of me, through me, on top of me as I sleep. As I am I again. The drain is clogged with your hair, your remains, your stay forevers. Is this what you were planning on telling me? Is this what you waited years to mutter nervously to me in a coy murmur. So so so so ssssssorrry? Moan your nonsense into my perked ears, into my daytime, into my sock drawer. I’ve got so many secrets that you thought you knew all along the song, but you just listen to the melody and my sharp voice stabbing again and again. I told you exactly what it was like to be killed and how it felt to be flung from a speeding train into a freezing cold river. I told you what it was like when my flesh was torn and my skin ripped violently as I crashed through the ice surface into the freezing cold stream. Then, I explained the pain of millions of pins and needles being jabbed again and again into my every inch as my head was yanked into the flood. I yelled to you from the brink- I yelped back at you waving from the rescue helicopter about how my nearly lifeless body banged and crash as the gush of the current ripped my spirit to shreds…all you did was nod your head. For that you are forgiven. But you didn’t even offer a blanket when I crawled out of the rapids miles from the pitfall…and for that, I wish you a cold, long winter.